Gender dimension in Conflict management
Niki Roubani

Conflict management in our society and between people is currently examined from different perspectives and at different levels, i.e. from the sociological, psychological, political and even pedagogic point of view. A common element penetrating all perspectives is that the successful, creative and stable conflict resolution is linked to three different considerations: the level of identity (including self knowledge, self respect, and confidence)
The level of values(values linked to equality before the law, equality of citizenship and the vision of a just society)
The level of behavior and communication (honesty, respect to the personality of the other, pursue of just solutions).
Gender issues are everywhere a concern, whether made obvious or not in the choice of  priorities of the different governments. According to the views of modern economists (World Bank, 2001)the gender issue has an important effect on ‘development effectiveness’ and it  is not just a matter of political correctness or kindness to women. The same claim that when men and women are relatively equal, economies tend to grow faster, the poor move more quickly out of poverty and the well being of men, women and children is enhanced. The conflict of values and persons on the basis of gender exists everywhere, on the other hand, and it is one of the leading causes of violence. The different parameters shaping these conflicts, such as religion, and the influence of religious leaders on policies, the social class in which someone belongs, the social values, the traditions, are also affected by the stereotypes concerning characteristics attributed to men and women. In Greece and Turkey, as well as in other parts of the world, boys are praised for being brave, intelligent, good leaders, when they can make money, when they are not afraid, and are scolded for expressing grief and uncertainty. On the contrary girls are praised for following orders, being nurturing, self sacrificing, having an eye for detail, while blamed for being weak, cowardly, without the ability to make up their own mind, or on the contrary for losing their femininity when they are taking risks and have ambitions of their own.
These stereotypes are an obstruction to the natural development of men and women and stop men from being nurturing and affectionate to their family, from being good listeners, from acquiring negotiating skills and patience, while also stopping women from taking creative risks in their research, arts, personal development. There is no encouragement and respect in the holistic personal development of boys and girls so as to let them acquire skills for a satisfactory life, what we call ‘life -skills’.
These skills are assets, which enable each person, to develop both the courage for leadership, while also, showing consideration and respect for the fellow human beings, to learn how to express an opinion but to also listen carefully to the others. When a person is developing in a holistic way it is not necessary to develop hostile feelings of antagonism towards the others and the wider interests of society, because ambitions and courage can be achieved as well as doubts expressed, and advise may be sought from the more experienced, without people being considered ‘losers’ or dependent. They may seek leadership but also follow, true to ideals and values above their shortsighted interest; they may enjoy family life as well as their jobs. The shaping of a basic component of our identity, which is gender, has a decisive role in how secure and whole we feel and therefore in how we can approach difference in general.
Developing life-skills in a holistic way is possible when difference is seen as an asset and equality has been achieved. Then people are not ashamed to be consistent with their ideas, aspirations, values, and to express feelings and worries, whatever ‘gender’ or sex, what nationality, or ethnic group they belong to. People who are free of stereotypes and extreme positions are more able to work for peace. Societies that enhance these values form the support structure for such people.
 

12 critical areas of concern identified in the Platform for Action (PFA) also known as the Beijing goals for the 2005 review

1. The persistent and increasing burden of poverty on women
2. Unequal access to and inadequate educational opportunities
3. Inequalities in health status, and unequal access to and inadequate health-care services
4. Violence against women
5. Effects of armed or other kinds of conflict on women
6. Inequality in women's access to and participation in the definition of economic structures and policies and the production process itself
7. Inequality between men and women in the sharing of power and decision-making at all levels
8. Insufficient mechanisms at all levels to promote the advancement of women
9. Lack of awareness of and commitment to internationally and nationally recognized women's human rights
10. Insufficient mobilization of mass media to promote women's positive contribution to society
11. Lack of adequate recognition and support for women's contribution to managing natural resources and safeguarding the environment
12. The girl-child.


What is a Circle

In her book 'Women Circling the Earth', Beverly Engel offers a powerful guide to fostering community, healing and empowerment. A circle is not just a gathering of people who sit in a circle on the floor or a meeting where the chairs are arranged in a circle. Circle meetings provide simple, yet powerful tools to help teach people how to communicate more honestly and openly. What we wish to promote is an alternative to box-like hierarchical structures and confining systems which dominate today. Among other things, circles can help us to:

·  Listen without judgment
·  Foster cooperation and understanding
·  Help implement creative solutions to problems
·  Bridge differences
·  Help settle disputes and reach consensus
·  Encourage reconciliation and apology

We live in a world that cultivates separateness between people. When people join together in circle, they become keenly aware that such separateness does not really exist on a deeper level. Circles help alleviate the feeling that we stand alone against the harshness of modern society. They remind us that we are all one.